Sunday, October 16, 2011

between heartbeats

i like the attention,
showing affection.
wondering and dreaming
wishing and scheming.
painting pictures on an imaginary canvas
showered in vast colors
full of life.
like a silhouette in sunsets
where vibrant streaks flow into rivers
wider, deeper, colder, shiver,
stretching to the end of the sky
coursing deep rich blood out into the open
pumping consistently, reaching high
reaching to the very heart in my being,
i can't help but seeing
a dark cloud behind the sun
it's not something i believe in
nor a reality i wish to be in.
so i hope and wish it's not over
not time to move on
to uncover a life on my own.
i ignore the cloud and pretend it's not there
cause no one cares if i lie and pretend everything’s alright
when its not.
the lipstick stain across earths sky
slowly starts to die.
the color begins to fade
as i wish it all away.
to be free from earths down falls
to live in sunsets and rainbows.
to dream to the ends of the earth
in a longing defense to save the world
from excruciating pain that only happens to those who don't know
how to draw such an extravagant picture
of perfectness and happiness.
without expectations or any exaggerations
of a place too good to be true,
with the kiss of morning dew on the grass between my toes
leaving my bareness fully exposed.
and i might be happy for a while
until the rain clouds tumble forth
shooting across the sky, spitting down remorse
for miles and miles.
shaking the ground
clattering pounds of excess weight on my head
till it rings with the sound gone unsaid
in a throbbing heartbeat.
cold and alone screaming through the pitter-patter
lye the emptiness found in shatters
between heartbeats.

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