Sunday, June 10, 2012

The Secret Ingredient

There's nothin' better than my mother's pumpkin bread.
It's been my favorite food since peanut butter and jelly outgrew it's welcome in the 3rd grade.
It's my favorite midnight snack. Ask anyone in the house and they'll tell you a sneaky mouse came through the kitchen in the middle of the night... every night it's there!
Living away from home this year at college, I've tried to make it on my own thinking, if I could just relive the goodness in my mouth...it'll be like a sweet taste of home.
It's just not the same.
I even use the SAME recipe! Our recipe is a secret family recipe, passed down from my grandmother, to my mother, to my sister and I, and anyone who try's my mom's pumpkin bread asks for the recipe, but this is one thing we never hand out.
I've tried to make it over and over! My sister has made it over and over (uh... it's not bad sis, just not the same...ha!)!
It's just NOT the same!
There's just something missing...
I've got the allspice, the nutmeg, the cinnamon... the flour, the sugar --the base and the core. We even use pumpkin my mom carved out herself (ssshhh!! that's one of the secrets)!
It's always moist --never under or over baked.
Soft and spongy.
Always the perfect amount of chocolate chips.
Consistently pure bliss --always, without fail.
Maybe it's a mom thing. Maybe I'm just missing all that extra love she pours in with it. My whole life she's just been serving us, pleasing us... loving us.
Maybe that's the step I've skipped.
I don't know what it's like to love my own child, but maybe that fragile, raw, selfless love that makes us pour out more of ourselves than we could ever get back... maybe THAT'S the secret ingredient that draws me in, and always keeps me coming back for more.

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